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I’m going to be joining in with Confessions of a SAHM’s new linky, being the A-Z of family. Each week we will go through the alphabet writing a post about one word ascertaining to that weeks letter. I think this will be a good challenge to join in with!
Becoming a family means adjustment. Adjustment to a new lifestyle, a new routine, new people. Nothing can prepare you for just how big that adjustment is. It’s OK going to antenatal classes and all that jazz, but when reality hits, woah, it’s a totally different league!
I found it incredibly hard becoming a 3 person family, and as my regular readers and those who have been there from the beginning know, I struggled an awful lot and suffered from post natal depression. It was so hard to adjust – suddenly I had this new little fragile person to care for, who would be dependent on me (and his Daddy) for everything. Clothing, feeding, bathing. It wasn’t just me that I had to do it for anymore. I suddenly became second priority.
Then when he was 6 months I unexpectedly fell pregnant again, naturally. I was even more terrified this time than the first time! Especially because I was suffering PND, I wasn’t ready. Caring for two little people only 15 months apart?! Unimaginable! I just didn’t know what to do. But of course I loved this new precious miracle life so much already. I had to adjust, yet again, so quickly. Unfortunately that wasn’t meant to be and it was another period of adjustment that our family of 4 wasn’t going to happen just yet, whilst grieving from losing a precious child.
The miscarriage though, made us realise that yes, we did want this now, and whatever it took, we could do it. We could look after two little people. Heck, after the first one, you know what you’re doing right?! 6 months after our loss I fell pregnant for a third time. It was a tough few weeks up until our scan, but then I could relax a little (not much) and prepare for adjusting to becoming a family of 4, finally, hopefully.
Fast forward 9 months and it was all real. Our second little man arrived, and it wasn’t only me & hubby that had to adjust, it was J also. For almost 2 years he had been an only child, and then this other little human comes and steals his limelight. This time, it was him that had the most difficulty adjusting. Though he has got there in the end. It kind of just slipped into place for us adults – I can say it was definitely easier adjusting to 2 children than to 1!
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I think you pretty much echo my sentiments about having kids. I always say to people that the difference between having no kids and one is massive, and that the difference between one and two is still big, but ultimately you're much more prepared for it. After that, I really don't think there's too much difference at all. Thanks for linking up again. #FamilyFriday
I don't think we realise just how much of an adjustment it is when the first baby comes along – and then when the second (and third etc) it's still a adjustment, just not as big!
Thank you for linking up with the A to Z of Family! xx
Sorry to read about your miscarriage and you're right all we do as parents os adjust 🙂 #familyfriday
I don't think anything can prepare you for having a baby, you can read as many books as you like but nothing will quite prepare for that adjustment!
We have a similar age gap with our boys, it's hard work but lots of fun 🙂