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You may have read my previous posts about J’s challenging behaviour and I have been at my wits end for months, fast running out of ideas on how to deal with it. I’ve spoken with nursery, I’ve spoken with the health visitor, I’ve spoken with one of my friends who worked in a nursery for a long time; I’ve consulted the internet, blogs, my peers, but nothing seems to change. So either this is just instilled into him or I am just a rubbish mother!
Anyway, a few weeks ago I had quite a breakdown with his behaviour. I was already feeling pretty rubbish in general and he just pushed me over the edge. We had been at our usual Tuesday play group (run by the friend mentioned above) and he had been defiant all morning, then he pushed another child who was just minding his own. I just completely lost myself then and we left with me in tears and having to call my brother-in-law for help with the boys as I was breaking down. My friend came round later that afternoon and mentioned a ‘Parenting Pistop’ run by the local Education Preparation Unit. I thought it sounded worth a try so she made a referral for us.
Last week we went to see the ladies who run it and to sign up for it if we were interested. We were told that it will only be a small group – six parents and children – so we can get the most out of it. The way it works is that the session is an hour and half long and us parents spend 20 minutes playing with our children and getting them settled in, in the play room – it’s a Sure Start centre so lots of activities – then we go off (while the children are supervised by one of the ladies) and have a discussion about our difficulties and methods of dealing with behaviour and the such. Both hubby & I can attend but it really depends on whether he can get the time off work, but we signed up anyway as I can make the sessions.
Mine & J’s first session is this afternoon, for a taster session. It will be good to have some time just the two of us too, as I know he needs more of it but it’s difficult when hubby works long hours and I’m home with both of them every day and N rarely naps. I will update you on how we get on – hopefully we will get somewhere this time.
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I completely know where you are coming from. My eldest was a difficult child from a very early age, but how much of that was just down to my own impatience and inexperience and how much was down to genetics I don't know. I'm pleased to say that now, at age 15, all his behavioral issues seem to have sorted themselves out and he's a pleasure to be around! Our younger two are so laid back too, it's funny how they are all different. Best of luck with the parenting course – I took one took when my eldest was really young and it did help. Chin up, I'm told they all turn out mostly all right in the end despite what we do! 🙂
Oh I hope I don't have another 12 years of this!
Sounds like a good concept, especially as it is a small group. Hope it works out for you.
Thank you, me too as it is so stressful now.
Parenting is so blummin hard sometimes, isn't it? Good luck at the taster sesion.
It sure is! Thank you.
[…] for almost three years, and the staff and his key worker had been amazing with him through the behaviour difficulties we had with him a while back. His first day of school came around quickly, and he looked so grown […]