Way before I even met DH, and way before we even considered TTC, I always imagined when I was a Mummy I would have a little girl. I suppose that was my dream, so I could dress her up in cute pink dresses and pretty headbands! It never even occurred to me about having a boy. DH had always wanted a boy so he could do the cars thing with him, but when we found out I was pregnant, he decided he would love a little girl. (Of course, whatever the sex, we would have been over the moon, these were obviously just our dreams!). 

Well, my Mummy instinct kicked in, and I just knew we were having a boy… My feelings towards my baby didn’t change because I thought he was a boy, nor when we found out that I was correct. Of course I had immediately fallen in love when I got my BFP, but when the sonographer said he was a boy, my heart just melted, because I guess I already had this strong connection with him. And then, I could actually picture him in cool little blue outfits! (He doesn’t always wear blue, I’m just stereotyping here! I’m going to dress him in something pink soon! Though he’ll probably hate me when he’s older…) 

I guess the point I’m getting to, is why we decided to find out the sex. We had waited so long, and just didn’t want to wait any longer, although another few months wouldn’t have made much difference in the long run, but I’m one of the most impatient people ever when I finally get what I want! I know I’m not the only person ever to have waited a long time for the dream, and I know people who have, that have gone for the surprise option. I have nothing against that, I think a surprise is lovely, just not for us (this time!). Also, we wanted to be organised. We wanted a colourful pram, black wasn’t an option for us, so knowing his sex helped. Though in the end we went for red, which would have been suited for a boy or girl. We wanted to buy him some clothes, and having already looked around, there wasn’t that much of an option for neutral clothes that we liked, only (in our opinion) plain looking ones, nothing really colourful and gender obvious that we liked. (Not that we should have to make his gender obvious…) We wanted to get accessories and decorations for his room; before we found out his sex we had already decided that we would be having a car theme if baby was a boy, and something pink for the theme if baby was a girl! So once we found out his room was already planned out in my head!

The thing that makes me wonder, is when people say it makes you push harder if you have a surprise. I for one, definitely pushed as hard as I could even though I knew he was a boy! I just wanted to get him out and finally meet him after so long, and knowing his gender didn’t take the excitement away in the slightest. Though we have decided, if we are lucky enough, and decide to have another, we will be going for the surprise option! (And then I can answer my upcoming question for myself…) This will mainly be because we will already be mostly organised, with having a pram, gender neutral clothes for baby’s first few days, somewhere for baby to sleep, and so on. 

So, does it make you push harder if you are having a surprise? I guess this would be more relevant to those who have had more than one baby, and had a mix of finding out and having a surprise. Also, what were your reasons for deciding to find out the gender or not?


I'm Stacey, in my (very) early 30's, from a small village in North Lincolnshire. I'm a stay at home mum to two boys and a mental dog. You'll find me blogging mainly about food & lifestyle with a bit of random thrown in.

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  1. I think that when my time comes I will go for the surprise option, though I will find it difficult to resist temptation and ask the sex of the baby when I have the pregnancy ultrasound done 🙂 The reason is simple. My MIL didn't know the sex of my husbunts before his birthday. As a result, all his clothes were neutral and we still have these clothes, most of them in excellent condition. When my time comes, we won't need to buy much. MIL has kept everything and she is happy to give all my husband's baby stuff to us when I conceive 🙂 Now, all I need is a big BFP! Possibly after the 5-week trip to Egypt?!?!! 🙂

  2. Yes, hopefully!

    That's lovely that all of his stuff will be passed on, Jacob has my Moses basket from when I was a baby, and my teddy with his own personalised bib 🙂

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