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On Saturday we went to our first large family gathering with the little man, so the perfect opportunity to show him off! (A decision which I lived to regret slightly…) It was hubby’s Nan’s 90th birthday party, so there were a few of my in-laws attending, and people neither of us had ever met before.
It started at 1pm, and we were running a little late (I’m getting better with my timings and adding extra time for baby issues, a little more practice needed though!), so we arrived with the parents-in-law about 1.15pm. Little man was due a feed. As soon as we walked in the door he was passed to the first person, hubby’s Aunt. She fed him. He then went to hubby’s Nan. He cried, I changed his bum. All was calm with him then. Then it was time to sit down for the buffet. He was great all the way through us eating, sat in his car seat just exploring with his eyes. He was getting tired so came the tears, so hubby picked him up and took him for a wander. And then he was passed to the next person, hubby’s cousin. He calmed down for a few mins, and the off he went again. Off again, as in crying, and to the next person… Nan’s next door neighbour. Calmed. Cried. Back to me. To Daddy. Back to me. I finally got him calm and he was drifting off to sleep, so back in the car seat with his dummy to send him off. (Well, he was kind of half asleep, as he’s always nosy with one eye half opening when there are a lot of people around). And then, he woke up again after about half an hour. (Now this is where we have to bear in mind that in little man’s first couple of weeks, FIL was pressuring us to give him a dummy, but we didn’t want to at the time, it was our decision as his parents if & when to give him one. As it turns out we did eventually when he was about 4.5 weeks, as I was struggling quite a bit. I was expecting the ‘I told you so’ syndrome from FIL, which never came…) FIL blatantly saw that he had his dummy in, and never said a word… (There were only a few of us at the table – us, hubby’s Aunt & Uncle, and 2 cousins – this will make more sense later…).
Time for family photos. So he went and sat on Nan’s knee for a while, and then off he went again, crying. So hubby rescued him. And then someone stole him. The wife of some relation or other I think. It was so obvious he was tired, I was getting cranky because he was. She finally gave him back. Hubby’s Aunt wanted a quick cuddle, which I obliged because I knew she would give him back soon enough, as I told her we had to take him to my Mum’s, where he was staying the night, before hubby had to get off to work. Finally, I got him settled in his car seat again, and we went to say goodbye to Nan. Off he went again, screaming drastically this time. Nan says “Where’s his dummy, all of mine had a dummy and they all turned out fine”; the voice in my head says “Yeah, apart from FIL!”. (We’ve never got on with each other, different opinions, he doesn’t like anybody having one that is different to his own). It was the voice in my head as I just wanted to go by this point and little man was so obviously tired & distressed. To be honest, with the wanting to get away and trying to get through the crowd & noise, I totally forgot we had it, otherwise it would have been in. Anyway, I gave him it, after him fighting it and spitting it out. (He does that a lot, so not too worried at the minute about weaning him off it). Cue FIL, in front of everyone, “I thought you weren’t giving him a dummy?!” – as if to say I told you so! Yes, so why didn’t you just say that at the table earlier?! I angrily told him to not even start with that and back off – he soon did! I think he knows by now not to mess with me when I’m in a mood!
So there was me, embarrassed, trying to stop myself from crying, while smiling politely and saying goodbye to Nan. We finally got away, and little man fell asleep as soon as we got in the car on the way to my Mum’s. So yes, he was tired, and people passing him from pillar to post didn’t help matters much! Partly my fault for not stealing him back, but surely everyone knew he was tired – they all have children themselves!
Never again! Well, to any events with the father-in-law anyway…
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This is wear baby wearing comes in handy. I used to wear my sling as a top and in family situations would just steal him back and throw him in sling. You do end up looking a bit overprotective but who gives a crap? Our babies needs come first! And grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr point scoring FIL
Those old men think they know everything….